12 DAYS IN SOUTHAMPTON

     Upon my return to London I shacked up on the couch back at my old flat, you guys still rock, as do the new additions to the flat... Sophie. Also, hit the streets again with IPG, made £350 in my first week back... yeah that's right, I still got it. But looking for some cheap rent and a chance to see
other parts of England I took a little break from London and did a quick 12-day stint in Southampton to smash it up... didn't go quite as planned.

     Nice little area, definitely a bit quieter than other regions from the sounds of it, but nonetheless it ended on some interesting notes, starting with our pet goats. Yeah, I got to hang with Cheech and Chong, The Pet Goats... yeah that’s right, who else has pet goats.

Day 1 - Bored
Day 2 - Boreder
Day 3 - Really Bored
Day 4 - Hating it there
Day 5 - Had a couple beers
Day 6 - Had pasta for the 5 night in a row (even dinner was boring)
Day 7 - Worked out
Day 8 - Worked out
Day 9 - Worked out and made the flatmate jealous
Day 10 - Really Fucking bored with dinner and working out
Day 11 - Had to be kept away from rope and sharp objects
Day 12 - Read the following

     Can’t say I did my best sales while there, actually my first week I ended up owing some money. Not the best feeling in the world but at the same time a good experience. Learned a few things on my own and from the long time sales dude Toby and turned it around the second week. After two weeks of peace and quiet I should have known that it wouldn’t stay that way for long. My last day there was some excitement and laughs, if not for anyone else, definitely for me. It started with an idiot named Dom riding around on his £300 motorized skateboard.

In and out of the market he goes,
He hits a bump and it slips from his toes,
Flying solo onto the street,
It gets hit by a car… and I laugh my ass off
     As if that wasn’t enough, IPG’s very own aspiring INDY driver, decided to change my laughter to sheer terror. Driving back from the market we accelerate, and accelerate, and accelerate. The rest of traffic has stopped, and we continue to accelerate.

Here’s what’s going through our minds:

Dom’s – I have no idea, my guess – “The wheels on the bus go round and round…” Mine - He’ll stop… He’ll stop soon… He should start slowing down now… He’s speeding up…
“Dude are you going to Fucking stop?!!”
“What?... Oh shit!!!”

     In a feeble attempt to stop, after it's far too late, we avoid hitting the car in front of us by inches by swerving into other lanes of traffic. Miraculously the car didn’t even suffer a scratch, however, our hearts were close to matching the RPM’s and thankfully I didn’t have lunch that day or I may have had a problem in my pants after that close call.

     So I did leave Southampton with a bit of excitement and stories. But I have no intentions on heading back there anytime. But for now it’s back to London and I can’t help but wonder what craziness I’ll encounter there.